A blog by Kimberly Wolfe:
God is moving in our church. Last night’s youth service was filled with the Holy Spirit. Those who missed it, missed out on a very meaningful, heart-touching time with God; and I just wanted to share with you what the experience meant to me! Most of you know that last night wasn’t the first time God moved within the youth service; it was just the first time that I have been present when it happened. The only times I have felt The Holy Spirit in the past two plus years was when we went to “The Blaze” or to Pigeon Forge. In fact, several days ago, I was complaining to James that it seemed as though God was leaving me out, that I was being “left behind.” Every time I couldn’t be at church, (whatever the reason), would be the time James would come home and say, “You missed an awesome service! Everyone was talking about how The Spirit spoke to them tonight!” Those were bittersweet moments for me because I was happy for everyone else having that wonderful experience, but at the same time was jealous because they “got it” and I didn’t!
HOWEVER, no matter what my reason was for not going to church on those other nights, whether it was because Wesley was sick, because I wasn’t feeling well, or because I needed time alone at home to get something done – I WAS THE ONE WHO MADE THE CHOICE NOT TO GO TO CHURCH. God was NOT leaving me behind. I was leaving HIM.
My reasons for not attending on those nights were just excuses, some justifiable and others not so much. My point isn’t that we should never miss church NO MATTER WHAT, (although we should do our best to ALWAYS attend church.) My point is, DON’T BLAME GOD WHEN YOU ARE LEFT BEHIND! You see, I realized this morning that I was blaming God for “moving” and not allowing me to come along. I was envious of everyone who was “allowed” to go with Him. But this was Satan’s way of thinking – Satan was putting these thoughts into my head and telling me that God didn’t love me as much as he use to. Satan was using the time I missed church to his advantage. He knew I was tired and weak spiritually, hadn’t taken the time each day to re-fill my spiritual tank, and didn’t allow it to be filled at church because I didn’t go! Satan was watching me and waiting to strike just like a snake in the grass! He struck me. He bit. He made me fall.
But, by the Grace of God, I fell to my knees! See, Satan forgets that each time he knocks me down a little, I come back fighting hard! My heart, mind, spirit, and soul has and forever will belong to God. Satan may break my flesh at times, but God is always there to pick me up and heal me.
The Holy Spirit is moving people in our world today! God has never stopped using people to do His work. People have stopped ALLOWING God to use them!
We take God for granted! Even as Christians, maybe more so because we are Christians, we take God for granted. Just like we tend to take for granted our parents, grandparents, or siblings, we take for granted that no matter what we do, God will still love us. Yes, He will still love us, but the more sin we allow to separate us from God, the less He can BE WITH us and the less He can use us to help others. God and sin cannot co-exist within us. We chose one or the other every moment of every day. Every decision we make in our lives – yes, I emphasized EVERY – whether they are conscious or unconscious decisions, we chose God or we choose sin. There is no in between.
Did I choose sin just because I couldn’t go to church one night? Not deliberately; however, because I chose to “take a night off” and didn’t spend time with God during those times away from church, I opened up the opportunity for Satan to attack. Satan didn’t “make me do it.” I CHOSE not to go to church, not to spend time reading my bible, not to spend time in prayer, and to push God aside for the things I WANTED to do at that moment. I ALLOWED Satan in.
I’m writing this down for myself, just as much as I am for you all, as a reminder to make God Choices. This has been a learning experience for me and I hope if you are also having these feelings you have learned that God loves you – He didn’t leave you behind – He didn’t leave you out.
CHOOSE GOD! He’s waiting for you!